The Deep Blue Eyes

 “No matter what happens to you, if you have life, with faith and hope, you will live to see your situation change.” ― Lailah Gifty Akita,

Blue eyed Neelakshi was a young girl from Mukhed in Nanded district of Maharashtra. She was a fine-looking, stout girl with dark bluish eyes, making her parents choose the name for her. She was intelligent, with black curly hair, but was not a fair child. Her skin had the healthiest glow, but she was not very tall. In today’s world, if these qualities were pronounced by anyone they would be rated as a pervert or a sadist, but Neelakshi belonged to the good old days and was 60 years old now. As she grew older she spent her days running in the fields, and crossing the hurdles over the endless puddles. She never cared to look good as no one saw her beautiful curly hair, her large beautiful eyes or her ability to work hard and help her parents. They only saw her dark skin and pined thinking about her future. She wanted to study, but her parents felt it was the greatest sin for a dark girl to study.  She feared her father who snarled at her mother and her siblings.

Neelakshi had a younger brother who was lean, lanky and lazy because of the constant pamper and wheedles. He was darker than Neelakshi and Sashimi her sister, but he was put in the best school in the neighbouring village.  There were no racist remarks on his dark skin colour as he belonged to the patriarchal society. He would fuss to go the school and had failed to clear the exams, but he was sent everyday to the school. For Neelakshi and sashimi the vision of studying remained a castle in the air. Years flew by Neelakshi and her sister Sashimi was married off into affluent families who needed wives to run the families and take care of their sons. Sashimi was used to this monopoly from the childhood and waited for nothing else. She was happy with the routine, mundane household jobs and her occasional breaks.

Neelakshi was intelligent and had always nurtured a desire to study and do something different, but as luck would have been she was married off to rich and haughty Shrinarsu. He was fond of Neelakshi, but would never stop himself from scolding her at the slightest fault. He would hurl abuse, blame her and many a times beat her when he felt things weren’t going according to his wish. Neelakshi grew subdued and lost the zeal she had in life. Life began afresh after Bhasker and Vanshika were born. She lost herself in their childhood and adulthood. Bhasker and Vanishika were sent to the best schools and the education made a difference to the kids. They were kind, soft spoken and did not like Shrinarsu’s behaviour. Soon the kids grew, settled in their jobs and got married. They moved to the cities were they were employed. Shrinarsu visited Bhasker regularly with lots of goodies to please his little grandson. Neelakshi accompanied him to the city as she loved being with her daughter in law.

On one such visit Shrinarsu felt uneasy and suffered a stroke. Bhasker got him admitted in the best hospital. He ran hither, thither to keep Shrinarsu alive and able.  Bhasker loved his father and could not bear seeing him turn into a vegetable. For almost ten days he remained crippled, and then a miraculous recovery brought him back to normalcy, but he could not walk or move like earlier. Neelakshi was appalled to see Shrinarsu suffer, the pain of parting at the brink of life was unbearable, but destiny had something else stored for both of them. Neelakshi felt jostled into a life of emptiness after Shrinarsu recovered. They could not accompany their children in their outings and had to remain with their children for their help.

The doctor advised Shrinarsu to walk every day with the help of the walker. Bhasker cheerfully took up the cause. He made Shrinarsu walk by instructing him stiffly so that he would not turn listless. Neelakshi would sit on the stairs which led to the upper floors watching them walk. When Bhasker went for work, Neelakshi would bring Shrinarsu for the regular walk in the corridor. She would instruct stiffly in Marathi, ‘put your right leg, give a push to the walker, put in more effort, move away from the elevator, and do not move towards the stairs' and so on. She would sometimes get annoyed and yell when Shrinarsu would get lost in deep thoughts, feeling bad for his helplessness. She would then get possessed with anger and yell, 'haven’t I told you to move on’. Shrinarsu was vulnerable, and behaved like an infant who did not mind being ticked off.  As days went by, Neelakshi seemed obsessed about the exercise; she had definite time schedules and never left an opportunity to rebuke Shrinarsu who could do nothing other than listen to her. One could never make out whether his feelings were hurt as Neelakshi used every opportunity to overcome the humiliation  and grief she had nursed for years. Her eyes blazed and the deep blue eyes were never benevolent.

 On a holiday as Bhasker began helping his father walk, he saw him almost walk towards the stairs, the tiresome week and many more bottled up feelings made him rush to his father and shake him angrily and perhaps he would have slapped him had his eyes not met his mother’s deep blue eyes. The deep blue eyes moved away and rested on Shrinarsu, she saw her husband a mellowed person, sad and defeated. Their eyes met for the first time in the traumatic six months and they seemed to speak endlessly. Shrinarsu’s eyes had the regret of living, a regret of having been annoyed and arrogant; it beseeched mercy while Neelakshi’s deep blue eyes were hollow, lacked care and displayed embarrassment. She felt responsible for Bhasker’s behaviour, she shoved him away and gently told Shrinarsu‘put your right foot, you will walk soon’. There was compassion in her eyes, and belief in her action, which perhaps proposed a fairer society.

 “It was really amazing the number of hard hits from which a mind could recover.” ― Stephen King,