“It's funny how, in this journey of life, even
though we may begin at different times and places, our paths cross with others
so that we may share our love, compassion, observations, and hope. This is a
design of God that I appreciate and cherish.” ― Steve Maraboli
The speaking tree column by
Janina Gomes ‘Know That You Have it in You’ on the 28th Feb on
contempt left me contemplating the vast and diminutive issues which may have
influenced one’s life in their personal sphere, at their workplace or in their
social life. It said contempt for anybody- the less privileged, the vulnerable
people of other faiths, women, those who live ind ependently, the differently abled-the
mentally challenged could percolate down
the different strata of society. It set me pondering on the saying as it
definitely confirmed how people enjoy hurting others and inflicting pain
through words of scorn and hatred. It reminded me notably of the incident which
occurred a few days back.
With the onset of
spring the days have slowly begun turning
hotter. It was one of these hot
afternoons when one could feel the high
temperature in the atmosphere. The play school children who normally linger in
the garden with their mothers till half past one had gone back home. The watch
man was back into his cabin after his rounds and the stillness in the complex,
and on the roads was significant. I heard the loud resonance of our calling bell
and rushed to the door hoping the
visitor wouldn't press the bell a second time due to the impatience I felt in
the first call. I peeped through the peep hole to see the figure of a woman with two long sticks very
close to the grill door, stopping me from opening the door. I now peeped
cautiously and found that it was none other than my maid. I quickly opened the
door wondering what had gone wrong as she had finished her work in the morning.
She had bought two long cobweb brooms and stood in the corridor for approval. She
looked worn out with the day’s work, the chill in the early morning and the
afternoon heat had left her skin dark dry and shrunken but still, she looked at me hopefully for a consent. I
looked at her inquisitively as she beamed
and reminded me that I was the one who requested her to bring it . I acknowledged
nodding my head and asked her the price so that I could pay and send her off
but she wanted me to know that she had found the vendor faraway when she was
returning home and had come to give it as the vendor would not be allowed in
the premises. Perhaps my curtness for paying the money made her sad as I could sense her disappointment. I
hastily smiled as I asked her to give the cobweb broom. She asked me my choice
and tore the plastic sheet from the covered head to show that she was giving me
the better piece and it was actually a better one with a static broom head
while she kept the plastic broom head for herself. I rushed in and brought a
hundred rupee note and thrust it in her palms. She looked at me saddened and
said that she had paid the hawker and did not need the money immediately .I
told her that I could forget the transaction and compelled her to take it and
sent her home so that I could continue the incomplete work which was left. I
understood that she wanted to be approved for having been practical
The next day when my
maid came for work I told my husband that she had bought the cobweb broom relinquishing her precious time in the afternoon.. This was
to help my maid over come the disappointment she had felt the previous
day. She was pleased with the
appreciation and explained the whole deal to my husband in Marathi with a
quiver and a shrill pitch in her voice which justified the
delight she felt. Janina’s column reminded me that how contempt surges with
ease for the under privileged. My maid
had trusted me with her money but would
I have the same faith first if I had
mislaid anything at home? The burglary in one of the fla ts had evidences pointed at the maid
first and then at the watchman. We not only hold them responsible but shower
words of disapproval rather than appreciation. Janina says that those who hold
others in contempt do so out of their own inadequacies and frustration and
that those who know the true meaning and purpose of life uplift lives through
appreciation. It also helped me figure out how a optimistic person finds the
world positive and the words del ivered by such
an individual are nev er
mocking or sarcastic while a person filled with resentment tries to haul words
of hatred, conceivably trying to experience peace for himself in the deliverance
that life has been harsh towards him. The elation felt by my maid for having
been useful to me was great strength and joy for her as reflected in Janina’s
words which say ‘Appreciation heals divisions,builds bridges and adds to our
strengths,it helps us with self affirmation and brings positive forces into play giving the
‘Feel good’ Feeling.
Lets resolve to stop being unkind and traumatise others with words of
contempt and make the world a better place to live.
.
“Appreciation is a wonderful thing. It makes
what is excellent in others belong to us as well.” ― Voltaire
Yes, but can someone say why it is so rare in India? I found that people in western countries are far more generous with praise. Is that a reason why young talented Indians prefer to work in America rather than in India? Let us resolve to give a compliment promptly - then and there - as soon as it is due.
ReplyDeleteThank you sir, I genuinely wish people answer this question of yours. Don't know the reason but people lose their humility and gain pride for the slightest gain in status, Perhaps this would have been embed if we knew the politeness principles,
ReplyDeleteTimely appreciation works as a tonic and a feel good factor for both the giver and the receiver -provided it is genuine!
ReplyDeletethanks for reading vimala, true otherwise it would be called flattery.
ReplyDelete