The Eagle's Talons

“The truth is I'm getting old, I said. We already are old, she said with a sigh. What happens is that you don't feel it on the inside, but from the outside everybody can see it.”  Gabriel Garcí­a Márquez       

The duo staggered, they spoke in whispers to each other.  They were friends, to be precise women who were growing old rapidly. A few years back, I had always  seen them rush back home as early as six in the morning.  Forever, they had the beaming smile then, and a cherishing purpose. Today, it was almost six thirty in the morning as they entered the forest area. Most of the regular walkers were rushing back home, so were we.  They smiled and told me that they could afford to start late and go back later as there was no one at home to look forward to their presence. Their children had flown away, built their own nests,  and looked after their own families. Their growing years were now far more visible than ever. The fatigue that was never visible, was seen as dark circles around their eyes, and an obvious carelessness seen in their amble. The puffiness of their body spoke of their indulgence in any sort of food, without a concern for health, or  for timely meal.  Their clothes were a picture of discontent. It reminded me of a parent who commented on my post on the Speaking Tree, written in favour of parental love saying, ‘we love our children, but they should also have a concern for us before we quiver and fall’.

Long back when I visited the Bhartiya Vidya Bhavan School at Hyderabad, along with my friend Vimala  Subramanium to attend the PEAS (Program for Environmental Awareness in Schools) program, we saw a lovely poem  on a poster, stuck on the wall of  the entrance near the office. I wanted to write the poem, but my friend said she had it with her. The poem depicts a mother’s feelings when she is old conveying how her youth flew and there were times when her little one had asked her to read a story more at bedtime, however, she had to refuse it,  owing to her busy schedule, today when she has grown old, time stands still, and  she has the time to read more, as well as do more for her children, but her children have fluttered away. My son was a little boy of five then, while my friend’s son was a teenager. We both realized that it was the present that we needed to live in, and give more time for our children. The thought of our children moving away from us never crossed our minds then. Today I could easily empathize with my friends in the park, being the mother of a grown up son.

Recently we  had another Faculty Development Program. It was supposed to be the last one for the academic year. There was a lot related to the introspection of self. A few psychometric tests were also conducted with a self analysis of our tests, teaching us how human beings  can react to various situations in an accommodating way,  a competitive way and in many more ways depending on their upbringing and their ability to face  various situations. The program included a large number of examples. A common one was about the eagle that lives  for more than thirty years. Though we were then told about it as 70 years to emphasize a value. The instructor said that as the eagle grows old, its flexible talons are unable to grab a prey. Its beak loses its sharpness, and its wings are no longer able to take the quick sweep as they stick to the chest and turn heavy. In these circumstances, the eagle has the preference of dying or undergoing a  painful penance of living through the change where it lives away for a long period of six months by knocking down its beak, and wrenching out its talons and wings. It then waits for six months for the growth of  a new  sharp beak, and  sharper talons, that help it  again in the sustenance for another thirty years.

This was an example illustrated to help us live through a change, shedding the past memories and habits, traditions and  practices in a dynamic world. We treasured the session since it was a much needed one professionally in the vibrant world, when life can be overwhelming at times.

I reminisced that as the eagle, we encounter a change in our personal lives too. It is inevitable that our children grow and lead their own lives. An expectation from them leads to unhappiness and pain. My friends seemed lost as they were encountering the change, which was painful like the eagle’s penance, but with time new talons of the abilities and roots of rationality teach one to overcome the change by leading a meaningful life, with the difficult days transforming itself into experiences, making the person mature enough to lead  a life contentedly and cheerfully. Trials and tribulations of being away from our children make us stronger rather than bitter  as at every stage man comes across a  different purpose, helping him keep going courageously. Any decision involves a sacrifice, perhaps old age also brings about a sacrifice of companionship of children for long periods of time, but it definitely wins their love.  Any kind of sickness when treated with optimism cures sooner as no one has, nor will be able to escape aging,  sickness or death. Life is a stream of water that does not flow backwards.   A proper schedule with a walk,  a smile, good food, friends and a new goal each day can aid a person soar above old age, approximating the eagle’s talons.

“Hope is sweet.
Hope is illumining.
Hope is fulfilling.
Hope can be everlasting.
Therefore, do not give up hope,
Even in the sunset of your life.” 
― Sri Chinmoy,